Thursday, August 28, 2008
Ten Ponderations on Love & Friendship
I'm a curious kinda cat. I think people are much more interesting when they are faced with questions that reveal their true nature. I mean questions that make one think and consider the way they roll through this comic strip called LIFE. So, with this in mind, a while back I composed a survey on one of my other blogs. I figured, why not try it here, for those who are bold or honest enough to face the truth of themselves. So, without further ado, I now present
Moanman’s 10 Ponderations on Love & Friendship:
(A survey by me)
YOU are at your most realest when:
a) you’re comfortable with another soul
b) when you’re drunk off your azz
c) when you’re all alone
d) when buck-naked, after transcendent sex?
LMR: A) When I'm comfortable w/ another soul. When the vibe is right, whether we're engaging in convo or long stretches of silence, everything else just flows.
When someone shows you love, your usual M.O. is to:
a) reciprocate that action in some form
b) panic and out for the nearest exit
c) smile, sigh and let the moment pass
d) take it as a given and do nothing?
LMR: A) Usually I'll return the gesture. Not that I should *feel* OBLIGATED, but I firmly believe that kindness begets kindness, and love should be a sharing of spirits.
When you blatantly LIE to someone you're supposed to love, do you:
a) feel mad guilty about it
b) let it go of it like an accidental fart
c) say a silent prayer
d) assume everyone lies, so what's the biggie?
LMR: A) I feel mad guilty... because lying is an affront to my better nature, but I'm not perfect & sometimes a gentle lie becomes necessary.
Picture it: You’re engaged in a very intimate conversation where certain secrets and truths are revealed. Later on you and your former intimate are no longer speaking, yet, you are still armed with that preciously intimate info… when upset would you:
a) use that precious info against them
b) make a crude joke about it
c) still hold tight to that precious information
d) tell all your friends and have a good loud laugh about it?
LMR: C) Keeping someone's secret is a sacred thing. All we have is our word, and if I promised to keep it earlier, then my word is my bond.
Someone you purportedly love is hurt-up and emotional. *You* did *not* personally cause this hurt, but you’re really NOT in the mood to deal with it. Do you
a) tell them that in effect 'This too Shall Pass'
b) sigh, let them riff and bore you to tears
c) be kind and listen with an understanding ear, perhaps even offering advice
d) simply tell them buck-up, and stop being such a drama queen?
LMR: A & C. I would try A... hoping it will help and that they might become philosophical about their plight. But if that didn't work... *sigh* then C would be the move.
When YOU’VE hurt someone, unintentionally, are you usually sensitive or compassionate enough to even be aware of it? If so, how would generally follow-through to help to close that emotional wound? Would you most likely
a) let time pass and trust them to get over it
b) make an effort to fix what's broken by a call, an email, a letter
c) invite them out to have dinner and a long talk
d) shrug, and question if this friend is a bit too damn sensitive for your comfort level?
LMR: C) Communication is key. Everyone has their stuff and things that upset them that I might unaware of... some having dinner & talking it out helps us to understand where we're BOTH coming from, & hopefully this will squash the madness, literally.
Have you ever meant to tell someone the Gentle Truth, but it came out harsh and hurtfully? If so, did you try to fix it, pretty it up, or simply let that Truth breathe and breed?
LMR: Depending on the situation, I might see the need to let the truth breathe, hoping that they might begin to check themselves.
When a close friend wants to hang out with you, but you’re busy or just not in the mood, your tendency is to:
a) deliver a quick and feeble excuse
b) tell them you’re not feeling it, and hope they’ll understand
c) shrug off your plans, sigh, and accompany them
d) gently remind them that you have a life that doesn’t always have to include them?
LMR: B) Being that I'm an author, I'll often use the little free time I have to write and be creative. So, a true friend would have to understand that, and not take it personally.
If Love is a verb, are your verbal enough for, and to those you love?
LMR: Very, very, vurrrrrrrrrr verbal.
Was the last thing you did in the name of Love?
a) something sweet and kind
b) something sexy and physical
c) something martyr-like and sacrificial
d) something warmly sentimental and lasting?
LMR: C) Sometimes you have to sacrifice for love.
And for those who chose to answer, thanks for the honesty.