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Wednesday, May 19, 2010

We Are Really 'TOO SHY TO SAY'???

“Too Shy To Say"

You make me smile
You make me sing
You make me feel good everything
You bring me up
When I've been down
This only happens when you're around

And I can't go on this way...
With it stronger every day...
But being too shy to say
That I really love you...

I wanna fly
Away with you
Until there's nothing more for us to do
I wanna be
More than a friend
Until the end of an endless end

And I can't go on this way...
With it stronger every day...
But being too shy to say
That I really love you...

And I can't go on this way...
Feelin' it stronger every day...
But being too shy to say
That I really love you
Ohh.. ooooooh-ohhhhh-who....
Oh, I... do...” ~ Stevie Wonder

Thank you, Sir Stevie!

I’ve always, ALWAYS appreciated The Gift and the artistry of Stevie Wonder… and I’ve always, ALWAYS adored that ballad. It is the sad song of the chronically shy and terminally tongue-tied soul. It is that quiet anthem of the frustrated inner poet. It fits perfectly with a theme I’ve been meaning to discuss. And this page seems as good a place as any to broach the subject:

Stevie sang that song ages ago. But the question remains today: Are WE Too Shy to SAY?

When we truly dig someone, like someone, even LOVE someone, why are some of us so damned tongue-tied about expressing it? Are we only poets at our fingertips? Are we spoken word artists performing live, for one-night-only, behind the mic of a cell phone?

How many of us are tried-and-true romantic waxers, angelically lush sweet-talkers? How many of us are mad spinners of magic, keen pitchers of woo, and yet… when face-to-face, belly-to-belly, we lose our juice... misplace our voodoo... drop-kick our lyrical muse?

Where do duh mojo go, yo?

Are we, in reality, these verbal stumblebums?

I ask this question because, I’ve noticed in myself, and in others, this strangely reticent factor enters into the realm all too often when we’re one-on-one.

In letters, on paper, on the phone, on my screen, I am King. I am all things: brilliant, verbose, sexy, clever and funny. I am the most wise, intelligent, sweet, deep, sensitive and kind mofo. In other words, I’m all harps and strings, and triangles tingling. I am the symphonic equivalent of Duh Bomb, yo.

So where does that bomb cat go... when he’s supposed to arrive and deliver that bomb show inside the beautiful, if less symphonic reality?

Is he shy? Is he dumb? Is he borderline retardo? Was he a Lyrical King, only by proxy, or did his doppelganger send in Cyrano?

I am fundamentally a word-man. Words are my friends. They sometimes represent me even better than my own physicality can. Words will spin around inside my chest, start a small riot in my viscera and then gracefully (or sometimes violently) pour from my fingertips.

This is the Art in me. This is the God Voice thrown from me. God is an Amazing Ventriloquist sometimes. Yet, it is still my voice.... my *authentic* voice, in lines, in dashes, in squiggles.

But... I don’t always speak the way I write. The Writer Me, well... he can be a tad more eloquent, more formal, more passionate, more didactic, more poetic, and more a dictator/conductor of my heart’s purest language.

Hmmm... but one can't go around speaking in the same way they write! That would be tres ridic, and mad corny, wouldn't it? It would not be very 2010 of me, to run around reciting these heartfelt soliloquies!

But apparently, I’m not alone. Often, I feel lost on a small prosaic planet of poetic souls, turned verbal idiots. People who’ve shown me so much promise, so much warmth, so many degrees of idealism, lyricism and spirituality are often struck near-mute, or become these linguistic morons when suddenly face-to-face, eye-to-eye.

Sure, ply us with liquor, or some artificial stimulant and we can riff, kick, and spit it... like the best romantic poet. But it's here, in our most sober skin… that the romantic can often take a prolonged hiatus.

I wonder WHY that is, and what it is in the human animal that shies away from ebullient, effusive, romantic expression. I mean, obviously, we are capable of it, as we’ve displayed its soulful music, shown fits and verses and stanzas of it with our craft! Yet, when pressed to spring into action, it all dissolves into that shy-not-so-special-less-unique tongue of the ordinary!

Are WE too SHY to say?

Are YOU too shy to riddle me an answer?

And I can't go on this way...
Feelin' it stronger every day...
But being too shy to say
That I really love you
Ohh.. ooh...
I... do...”
~Stevie Wonder



Dorrie said...

nice to know I'm not the only one....

I love romantic lyrics, yet I cannot express myself verbally, sad but true.

Maybe we're afraid of how the other person will react, even though we KNOW they would appreciate those words.

Or it's just those inhibitions put upon us over the years. *sigh*

Felicia Monique said...

Love this post!

I don't know if shy is the best adjective. I think people are afraid of vulnerability. So, I would say it is fear that keeps people from those face-to-face, belly-to-belly confessions.

Personally, I don't mind the spilling of the heart on paper, the computer screen, or even text, as long as it's released!

Lovebabz said...

Oh why did I come over here today! Only wordsmithing soulmates understand this. Those of Us who seduce and are seduced by words have such high expectations that if we sense even a hint of misunderstanding, or dare I say, lack of excitement for words, we recoil. Shut down.

I have spilled my heart. I have purred like a well oiled machine, letting words drip from my beautifully painted lips like honey on warn bread and was met with a lack of enthusiasm. I will say there have been rare moments when the Beloved of the moment got me, understood me and thought the word-thing was HOT! LOL!

I have not lost hope though. I do dream of a pen pal, who writes lush letters and I write lush letters back....


I will say I love you.

CurvyGurl ♥ said...

Dang, you caught me...words flow freely when in my thoughts and expressing them creatively.
Allowing them to be verbalized is often one of hesitation, something I really need to change if I'm the lover of love I claim to be.

criticalcrass said...

yep. i can relate to this. i don't have an answer, though, to you question.

thanks for reading picky and leaving it some love. that was one of the nicest comments i've ever gotten. :]

Wizardress said...

My dear friend- I loved reading this and I can't help but wonder if it's a sense of vulnerability that one may feel, when exposing themself face to face.

When we are there- we can physically see and feel the body language of the other, and maybe part of us feels as though we're scared of how the other wiill react, or how open it leaves us to that reaction.

Maybe it boils down to fear of rejection- It's definitely something to ponder.

xxx Love you

Tia's Real Talk said...

I like this! I too am the same way. I express myself better via fingers. To be honest, to me, I recieve it better on paper also. I mean, if a guy writes well, I see it as endearing, sensative and passionate. But if he spoke the things he wrote, I would think he's a player or running game. Crazy?
I like a person intouch with their emotions. I think that a guy that gets tounge-tied infront of a girl means he really digs her and I think it's cute. Don't let it get too bad where it messes up the vibe and how you interact but you always know if someone is putting on a facade. Nice post!!

Kyon Saucier said...

God I can certainly relate... Maybe though why were too shy is because when it is face to face... There is that very real possibility of all of it, all the love stuff good and bad becoming real aand well that can sometimes silence a person.

Mizrepresent said...

On paper and in words we can honestly reveal our innermost feelings and desires. When faced to faced, we also face fear. The fear of rejection. We want to be that muse, that free-thinker, writer, lover, believer, romantic person and yet reality is so loud and so demanding...reality leaves us bare. Great post.