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Monday, May 3, 2010

If You Can’t Be With The One You Love, Honey…FONE BONE The One You’re With…

Tell me this has NEVER happened to you, and I'll have to call you a lie-yah...

Picture it: It’s a rainy night in your ville. You’re home alone, and maybe just a little lonely. You’re reclining in your favorite chair, or perhaps on the sofa or futon, contemplating your navel or somesuch ish.

The phone rings. You answer it. Instantly, you recognize the voice. It sounds a bit like you… a little lonely, a little weary, a little mean, a little sex-starved-woozy, too. You can telegraph the message of their breaths. Lately, you've become this keen student of breaths.

The two of you speak for a few, indulging in the usual ‘Whachu doin? Nothing. Well what you UP to? Nothin...’ B.S.

It’s waaaaaay past midnight… on a Sunday/early Monday morning. What could they possibly be UP to at this hour?

Gradually comes the revelation (aha!) They are feeling lonely for some company, and thought of you. They tell you how much they wish YOU were there with them, showering them with kisess, doing those all erotic, freaky things you do. But distance precludes you even considering the prospects of a Booty Call.

But the breathing… yes… the Breathing continues.

You know by instinct, just what they are doing on the other end. 'You so nasty!' You can TELL. It’s in their silence. It’s in the shortness of their breath. It’s in the slight mooooooaning, progressively grrrrroaning sounds they make in the back of their throat.

Ah yes. Phone sex. I’m sure many of us have performed this intimate, if long-distance private act.

Phone Sex. Ummm... yes, I have, on occasion indulged. I’ve been told that I can be pretty damn good at it.

But you don’t want to become SO GOOD at it that you get calls in the middle of the freaking night from someone asking you to soothe the horny beast that dwells within their Hanes, their Vicky’s Secrets, their Calvins, their Fruit of the…whatevers.

Still, if you know this person well enough… if they intrigue you, if you’ve been intimate with them before, you have that keen advantage of knowing just what they like, how they like it, where to touch stroke, probe, lick, suck, kiss. You know the secret of just what to say, what to do to those most deepest most intimate of or areas to please them.

The sounds they make are like your tour guide to their private bliss. The sound they make become like arias sang from the nudity of their souls.

Ah yes. Oh, yeaaaah. Phone sex. It can be as hot or vague or as mad vivid as the act of getting laid.

So you whisper into the receiver the things you want to do… and you tell them to close their eyes, to imagine you are there:

“Get Naked!” you demand.

“I am,” they say.

“No, you’re not! Get all the way naked for me, baby…” you whisper.

You tell them that their hand is no longer their hand, but YOURS touching them, stroking them, teasing them, pleasing them.

You become the aggressor, the mad lover/vagabond traveling along the terrain of their private contours.

You are the conductor of their electricity… and the forecaster of their body heat.

You are the private dancer between their sheets, between their legs, trashing inside that invisble heat.

If they want it romantic… you become the slow and probing body poet. You recite, you wax in poetic odes to a nipple.

If they want it raw and nasty, you become the cock-strong pornstar. You have the power. They’ve given it to you. And you use it to your slyest advantage.

The climax is in their breath. The yearning, turning, churning desire to erupt comes in the sigh, in the whisper, in the quiet groan… in the oh so scatological HOLLA!

Yes! Shit! Yes! Oh! You motherf... Ahhhh... Arrrrrrggggghhhhh!


Ah yes. People, well we all can be so trashy in those late night hours. And phone sex... well, sometimes it’s the next best thing to being there.



Mizrepresent said...

lmao, so true...yes i have been there on many occasions. What begins in the mind can culminmate into something grand, even if you do feel a bit guilty afterward, lol!

CurvyGurl ♥ said... a call to make *click* :-)

Dorrie said...

naughty boy *wink*

Lovebabz said...

You know too much... and you convey it so (erotic)(nasty)(sexy)

Can I repost this over at Pchats? With all acknowledgments to you!

Lovebabz said...

Oh and your sound track...KILLER! Make a Sister want to push a brother up against the wall and get it on...

hhmmm I am going to let your soundtrack waif through my house and see what happens in a bit....

Moanerplicity said...

Hey Lovebabz!

Thanks for the compliment, Lovely Sista. And yes, you may feel free to use this entry in any way you see fit.

BTW: I hope your natal day was ALL DAT... and a big ole piece 'o cake! (smiles)

One Love.


Gemini Girl aka GG said...

Yep been there..and the late night phone "booty" calls do the trick especially in a long distance relationship when those lonely nights just creep up on ya!
My goal is to find a local honey so the call will be "I'm on my way"

Gemini Girl aka GG said...

Oh sorry I didn't speak..HELLO (newbie alert) I found you over at lovebabz's spot!

thegayte-keeper said...

I haven't done phone sex in a while...

SLC said...

This is why a mind is a terrible thing to waste.........and neglect.
Nothin' but tha truth

CareyCarey said...

Man, please, next time post some damn alert :-(. You know, something like **CHICK FLICK**

I mean, man, come on! When I realized where you were going, I squashed that sh*t faster than I would a roach in my oatmeal.

Moan, man, please, don't have a brother feeling like he's reaching his hand under a bathroom stall.

Zane is calling you. And, I don't read Zane. :-(

I owe you *lol*

Well, I am sort of laughing. Why you gotta talk so nasty, Ray?

Moanerplicity said...

Hey Carey.

This was just a truthful lil page from my life. It's not meant to offend. It's a human thing. I think some folks make rules about what they will or won't write about. And that's cool, but I'm not one of those people. Once you do that, you can limit yourself as a writer, or stifle yourself as an artist of pure and honest expression.

BTW: I'm not a reader of Zane's work. Never experience a single book of hers. But as creative person, I'll go there when the mood strikes. I can, have, and will most prolly continue to kick erotic verse from time to time, as it's all a part of my evergrowing, ever-inclusive writing landscape.

Interesting that my female comments were far more... ummm... understanding. *smiles*

Anyway. Loving that line from Ray. LOL.

Peace bruh.



CareyCarey said...

Moan, make no mistake about it, I understand. One of the hardest things to convey through writng is humor. I was jacking with you.

But on another note, yet a simular note, you did say "Interesting that my female comments were far more... ummm... understanding. *smiles*

Yeah, I understand, and that's why I said... "please, the next time, post some damn alert :-( You know, something like **CHICK FLICK**

But seriously, I do understand, and let me tell you why. In my general every day conversation, I am not a cusser. And I generally do not have sexual conversations outside of me & mine.

Well, "sometimes", some individuals break out those types of conversations at the wrong time and at the wrong place. Which can be disrespectful. I don't want somebody talking all nasty and ignorant around my woman, and I ain't gonna talk that mess around theirs.

Anyway, in this blog thing, I use my artistic voice (blog voice). So, as an "artist" I most assuredly know where you are coming from.

Hey, I'm glad you caught that "Ray" line. If a black person can't follow that line with the line from the movie, I tend to give them the side-eye.

But man, get ready, this post has inspired another. And really, I did not read your/this post to the end. In my next post, I'll say why... in a joking way.

The working title... "NAWL, they didn't say that, or did they"

Moan, check this past post to see were I am going